HELPING MAKE YOUR CHRONIC PAIN JOURNEY EASIER
FROM PAIN TO PAPER:
Unleashing the Healing Power of Journaling

Journaling – an anchor in the everyday storm

For many of us living with chronic pain, negative emotions can linger like unwelcome guests, leaving us feeling overwhelmed, anxious, stuck, or even depressed. For two decades, I have tried a host of therapeutic tools to help me navigate these emotional storms and find a path toward healing, self-discovery, and successful pain management of my pain. Some of them have worked better than others, but throughout my journey there has been one tool that I return to time and again, the one tool I consider my anchor – journaling.

These days, I do a lot of voice journaling, but for many years I kept a written journal – in the most illegible handwriting, I might add! Any time I would go back and look at one of my journals, nine times out of ten, I could not read it!

A lot of the journaling that I do is stream of consciousness journaling – I just put pen to paper (or press play on my phone) and write (speak) whatever comes to mind, without stopping – it’s a great way to clear out the cobwebs that are in my head, things that I might be brooding about, or worrying about, or even just thoughts that are bopping around in there that I wasn’t even aware of. For me, it is all about a clearing process.

When I was at the Mayo Clinic, we were encouraged to journal, which I did, but I don’t tend to look back over those journals; they bring up difficult emotions. I like to think that they served a purpose at that time of my life, they helped me to deal with what I was going through in those moments, they were the emotional catharsis I needed at that stage in my rehab, not necessarily thoughts and reflections that I need to revisit years later. In a similar vein, the journals I kept during what were very tough years growing up have remained unopened.

I sometimes feel saddened that I am unable to go back to my journals, that the majority of my journaling is the release of negative emotion, that my journals are my vessels for my worries and problems, my physical, mental and emotional pain, my anxiety. But being able to release my inner voice is what I love about journaling, the fact that my journal hears things that no one else does. It is one of my coping mechanisms for the dark times, the times when I shut down, when I can speak to no one, just my journal.

I live with chronic pain, I get anxious and I know that I am a work in progress, but I am not a complete misery! I am filled with gratitude for my loving and supportive family and friends, and we spend many happy hours together. I have a good sense of humor; I love to joke and laugh. I enjoy being sarcastic and ironic, and there is a passive aggressive side to my humor as well. I have recently come to believe that journaling should reflect your whole being, not just the dark, sad or challenging parts, so I have started to inject some more amusing content into my journal. Not forced, not fake, just a few lighter, brighter moments.

If you have never kept a journal, or have fallen off the journaling wagon, let’s look at why you might want to reach for a pen and paper (or the device of your choice), and run through a few ways to get started. You may just find it’s the therapeutic sounding board you need, whether it’s to manage stress, release pent-up emotions and thoughts that no longer serve you.

Journaling does NOT have to be a lengthy or a labor-intensive process. Some of us enjoy writing. Some of us do not. There is no right or wrong way to journal just like there is no right or wrong way to deal with your chronic pain. It doesn’t require anything fancy other than some kind of notebook and your writing instrument of choice. If writing by hand is not possible for you, use a laptop or tablet.

What kinds of things can you write in a journal?

List your worries – worries can seem endless when living with chronic pain: ‘What will I be like in 10 years? Will I need someone to care for me? How will I pay for my treatments?’ The list goes on and on. Write your worries down in your journal. By writing them down, it takes away their tremendous power and helps you to move on rather than ruminate on them. Wake up in the middle of the night with a worry? Write it in your journal! Quite often when we go back and read the things we previously worried about, they don’t seem as dire as they did when we originally wrote them down. For me, if I don’t write down my worries, they will play on a continuous loop in my head making it seem like there are more than there actually are. If I write them down, I see that I actually only had 3 worries that day rather than the several hundred that I thought I had!

List your gratitudes – we are hard-wired to focus on the negative aspects of our days and the good things and blessings that come before us tend to go on the backburner. By writing them down, our gratitudes can take the place that they deserve – right at the top of the list. By listing our gratitudes on a regular basis, we realize that there is so much in life to be grateful for, even as we navigate the challenges of living a life with chronic pain.

Write down your intentions – I like to think of intentions as goals, but without the pressure. These are things that you intend to do, therefore if you aren’t able to fulfill them…it’s ok! When you live with chronic pain, it’s impossible to know how your day is going to progress. You could be having a great morning that turns into an afternoon of struggle. Or you can wake up in a lot of pain and unable to physically do too much, but by the afternoon you’re able to do a bit more. Intentions give us that leeway while also giving us a necessary roadmap (written in pencil) that provides us with a purpose for our day. That purpose helps to reduce anxiety and depression over things or abilities that we lost that we may have been able to do in the past. We do have purpose ... it's just different now.

List your lessons learned – every day we learn new things about ourselves and about how to make our lives more pleasurable despite the pain. The internet is filled with articles by wonderful writers who so selflessly provide us with ideas for what has worked for them on their journey with chronic pain. Since my memory isn’t what it used to be, I like to keep my journal with me at all times so I can quickly write down ideas that I’ve heard from my fellow pain comrades or from the lessons I’ve learned from the mistakes I’ve made along the way. It’s about progress, not perfection, right? We are lifelong learners.

List things that inspire you and/or give you joy! If I read a good quote, it can completely turn around my day! So I write them down. But perhaps quotes don’t do much for you. Start paying attention to the things that make you happy and bring you joy. Your favorite songs, your favorite episodes of TV shows, maybe you are creative and love to knit or make things with your hands. Post pics of them in your journal or just write about them. That way, when anxiety kicks in, you can turn to your happiness journal and remind yourself of all of the things that you have experienced in life that make you happy. Many people use their journals for their art and do sketches, paintings, or drawings. The point is to keep a journal of all things that fill your heart with joy.

Make it a free-for-all journal! As I mentioned earlier, when I journal, I tend to just write it down as it comes to me. I write my thoughts, my ideas, things I’m grateful for, quotes that I heard that inspire me, intentions, articles from newspapers that speak to me, doodles, things that I’m proud of for doing that day … you get the drift. Sometimes I add photos, receipts from great things I experienced, stickers, quotes, movies that people recommend to me, major events that happened on that particular day – the sky’s the limit! Remember that your journal is your own blank canvas, so fill it as you please.

Do not feel daunted. Nobody is going to read this journal – it is yours and yours alone. Nobody is checking your spelling. Nobody is critiquing your handwriting or your grammar. It exists simply as a way for you to love yourself and exercise self-care. Writing in a journal is a mindful activity that exists between you, your pencil, and your paper.

Do you have to do it every day? No.

Does it require a lot of time? No.

Do you have to buy a bunch of stuff? No.

There are no rules.

But this is something that you have control over when it comes to your health and it is such a simple thing to do.

Make it whatever you want to make it. Words are your fuel and you can add as much as you’d like, or as you feel like you want to give, on any given day.

Keeping a journal can make a difference between us being chronic pain ‘survivors’ and turning us into chronic pain ‘thrivers’.

Let the pages of your journal vouch for your strength, resilience, and determination.

And remember, you are not alone in this journey. Your story matters, and so does your pain.

#chronicpain #understandingpain #chronicpaincauses #painawareness #peersforpain #journal

Michelle Marikos’ fall from a balcony in her early twenties, and her subsequent decades long debilitating chronic pain, inspired her to launch Moving Through Chronic Pain and her PEER™ Method programs to facilitate deeper connections between those living with chronic pain and their community of providers, employers, and family members.

Michelle Marikos, Founder & CEO
Moving Through Chronic Pain